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Wedding First Look: Alternatives to the First Look Tradition

Are you still debating whether or not to have a First Look on your wedding day? If you’re not familiar with the term, a First Look is when the couple agrees to meet before the ceremony for a private moment, typically captured by the photographer and videographer. It allows the couple to see each other for the first time that day—before they walk down the aisle. What started as a modern twist on wedding traditions has quickly become a popular choice. But not everyone loves breaking tradition. Read on for our thoughts on how to decide what’s best for you, your partner, and your wedding day.


First Look Moment - Wedicity - Photographer: Andrew Thomas Clifton

Why Consider a First Look?

As wedding planners, we often recommend a First Look to help ease pre-wedding jitters. Whether you've been together for two months or ten years, you might be surprised by how emotional the day can feel. Between the excitement of seeing family and friends and the whirlwind of last-minute preparations, taking a moment to slow down and connect with your partner before the ceremony can be incredibly grounding. It’s a sweet, intimate moment just for the two of you, and many couples appreciate having that time together before all the festivities begin.


Another benefit of a First Look? It can save you valuable time later. By scheduling couple portraits and wedding party photos before the ceremony, you’ll free up more time to actually enjoy your cocktail hour and spend more time with your guests.


First Look Moment - Wedicity - Photographer: Andrew Thomas Clifton

Still Want the Surprise? Try a "First Moment"

If you’re not sold on the idea of breaking tradition but still want to connect with your partner before the ceremony, we’ve got good news—there are plenty of alternatives to a First Look! We like to call them First Moments. These moments let you share a meaningful experience with your partner without spoiling the big reveal of seeing each other for the first time as you walk down the aisle. Here are some of our favorite First Moment ideas:


1. First Moment - Hand Hold or Prayer

This is one of the most popular alternatives to a First Look. Find a wall, tree, or doorway where you can stand back-to-back or side-by-side, but without seeing each other. You can take a few moments to hold hands, pray together, or whisper words of encouragement. It’s a perfect way to calm each other’s nerves while still keeping the anticipation of the big moment intact.


2. First Moment - Vow Reading or Card Exchange

For a more emotional connection, opt for a vow reading or card exchange. Instead of seeing each other, you can stand back-to-back or with a partition between you and read your personal vows or exchange heartfelt cards. Listening to each other’s voice can make this moment incredibly intimate and moving.


WARNING: Be prepared for some tears! Make sure to check your makeup post-exchange and ask your planner for tissues. Trust us, we’ve always got some on hand!

Wedicity - Chicago Wedding Planner - Photography by Denise Espinosa -

3. First Moment - Song

If one (or both) of you is musically inclined, consider surprising your partner with a song. Whether you serenade them with a favorite tune or perform an original piece, this can be a powerful and personal way to connect before the ceremony. This unique idea is sure to make the moment unforgettable.


4. First Moment - Drink

For couples looking to kick off the celebration with some fun, share a First Moment toast. Blindfolded or standing back-to-back, raise a glass of champagne or your favorite drink and toast to your love, without seeing each other until you walk down the aisle. It’s a lighthearted way to get the party started early and add a little fun to your big day.


Wedicity - Chicago Wedding Planner - Photography by: City Savvy Imaging

5. The First-Last Look

Want to capture one final moment before you officially tie the knot? Consider a First-Last Look—an opportunity to capture your last look as an unwed couple. This could take place during your rehearsal dinner, at the hotel, or any other meaningful location the evening before the wedding. It’s a perfect way to document the last moments before stepping into your new life together.


Final Thoughts: Choose What’s Right for You

Whether you opt for a First Look or one of these creative First Moment alternatives, the choice is entirely personal. The important thing is to choose what feels right for you and your partner. Both options offer the chance to connect before the ceremony, whether through a private moment alone or a shared experience that keeps the tradition of surprise intact. Either way, you’ll create beautiful memories to look back on for years to come.


We’d love to hear what you and your partner are planning for your big day! Head over to our Instagram and tell us all about it!


Blog Post Written By: Wedicity - Wedding Day Detailing

Chicago based - Serving all destinations! 

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